Catherine, Ex-Catholic, Kenya
Description: After struggling with severe doubts about Christianity and trying to find the true purpose of life, Catherine finds true happiness, peace and purpose in Islam.
- By Catherine (Latifah)
- Published on 18 Feb 2019
- Last modified on 20 Feb 2019
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Assalam aleikum. My name is Latifah. A recent convert to Islam. This is my story.
I am a Kenyan lady, born into a Christian family as Catherine and raised as a Catholic. I have always been drawn to spirituality even as a child, and I would serve in the Church. When I became an adult, I questioned the doctrine of Catholicism and became Pentecostal. I found myself questioning so many things and after several disappointments by Church pastors, I quit the Church. I struggled with finding my purpose in this life. I struggled with depression and feelings of failure. I worked so hard so that I can make money and become rich as I thought this would make my life better.
Since converting to Islam, I have found peace and happiness. I am no longer compelled to pursue wealth as a source of happiness but to rather find happiness in all that God has blessed me with and to be grateful. I no longer feel stressed out about what the future holds as I have learnt to trust in God to fix all the matters in my life according to what God wills.
I converted through www.newMuslim.com website and have continued to learn and grow. I am grateful for the lesson for preparation of what to expect from people, both Muslims and non-Muslims, after you convert. This has helped me to be strong and know that this decision is for my own life regardless of what anyone else may feel or think about it.
What I struggle with as a new Muslim is lack of a support group. I am currently not in Kenya, and I have no contacts/network of new Muslims support here in Qatar where I work. However, when I go back to Kenya, I know I will find new contacts when I enroll in Islamic/Arabic lessons, God willing. I also struggle with some Christian songs and phrases coming to my mind at times, but when they do, I say audhu billahi minash shaitanir rajeem (I seek refuge with God from the accursed Satan) and say the Shahada. I also recite the various surahs (Quranic chapters) that I have learnt so far and ask God to help me and make it easy.
Lastly, I am apprehensive about going back to Kenya and facing my family. I am also curious as to how my 8-year-old daughter will adjust to a new religion since it is my obligation to bring her to Islam with me. I pray that it will be easy for her and all the changes will not be confusing to her. I suddenly feel the desire to get married and have a family; something that I had hated after going through a bad marriage at an early age that ended up in divorce and me being a single mom to my daughter.
With all is said and done, this is my takeaway—Allah is the solution. You can look for love and happiness in all the wrong places and pursue different worldly things hoping to be happy, but it is all a waste of time. The real purpose is to serve and worship God only and all the matters of your life will be ok. Just submit to God and his perfect will for your life, with a grateful heart, and God will make things easy in the hard times of life.
Anyone thinking about converting, I highly recommend www.newmuslims.com for guidance and advice. Also, for the new converts, continue learning through the lessons on this site and reach out for help via the chat line when you have a question /concern and you will find the help you need.
May God make your path to Islam easy and may God inspire and bless anyone reading this. Ameen.